Saturday, December 25, 2010

Christmas...

Those who know me, know I don't enjoy Christmas.  For others it is a great time of celebration and shopping.  For me it is stressful, loathsome, and difficult.  I always feel stressed out about being in such large groups - both shopping and at family gatherings.  I'd much rather meet one on one and have a quiet gathering than to have 20 - 30 people in a small space. 

Over the years I've learned to not shop after Thanksgiving.  The stores are crazed and people are insane.  When I go into the stores I feel a greediness so opposite of what the season is supposed to be about.  I watch the other shoppers rush around, grump at their kids, and be stressed out.  I think to myself - why are you doing this? 

Family gatherings are difficult.  It is always chaotic and loud.  There are always so many people around you can barely hear your own thoughts let alone conversation.  This year we went to Ken's side and it was better.  I spoke with nieces and nephew who I enjoy and have something in common with.  I listened to stories from brothers-in-law.  We had conversations which were fairly pleasant.  I know Ken would have liked to stay longer but I'd had my fill of crowded loud gathering. 

We came home and I napped.  I think I just needed to gather some peaceful energy around me to recuperate from the overload. 

Today we go to my family gathering.  I'm trying to not get stressed out about the whole thing.  I would rather stay home in front of the fire and read all day but I won't.  I'm sure it will be loud and stressful for me.  I'm hopeful that there will be some good quiet conversations while I'm there.  Only time will tell...

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